Kentuckianaland

Lovely performance last night for the Consoling Parents Support Group in Louisville, KY. Our hosts have been really wonderful, among other things they brought in dinner from this great local seafood grill place before the performance, and there was childcare for the kids who were there. Z&O had the chance to play with other children for the first time in a few days.

Due to a last minute conflict, Nick couldn't join us to run slides and sound - but he did spend a lot of time in the past couple of weeks updating the entire PowerPoint program so (ta-da) Toni was able to run it herself. Her connection to the show (which she must have seen a dozen times already) made her a little nervous about it, but she exectued everything perfectly.

The performance was held in the Beargrass Christian Church - one of the best spaces I have ever worked in! They recently expanded their facilities, adding a new, state-of-the-art sanctuary. The "stage" was solid hardwood, they have two large projection screens, and automatic shades to cover the stained glass windows. The sound system was okay.

I have found I have three kinds of audiences. Theater or "Fringe" audiences (which I have not performed for in almost three years), medical professionals (nurses, midwives, doctors, etc.) and bereaved parents and the people how love them. I usually know what to expect from any of these audiences. People there for theater find it "interesting." Medical practioners, even those who are affcted by it (and most are) treat it like a learning experience - and don't laugh. And the bereaved see themselves in large parts of the story and gasp, laugh or groan in expected (or not) places.

Last night was different. I knew it was a bereavement organization. Turnout was modest, which can effect reaction. Also, I was not wearing my glasses. This messed up the second line of the show, I said it but muffed it a little, which freaked me out - until I realized I was using part of my brain to focus, to make out faces. So I relaxed, stopped trying to do that, and actually felt a strange peace and relaxation I don't normally feel performing this show, because I had nothing to go on - I could look straight at them without wondering if they were sad, terrified, or just hated me.

But they were very quiet. I think Amy did the most laughing, and - I think, I can't be sure, I couldn't see - her 13 year-old daughter. I was surprised. Maybe concerned. A little worried.

We held a talkback after, and Toni got to join me onstage, which is alwasy good - betterm really - than me doing it on my own. People always have questions for her. And there were a few. Very few. The talkback lasted maybe five minutes, there was mostly a lot of soft talking and pauses.

I had an explanation afterwards, at the reception. What I was stunned to learn was how many of the audience members were fresh in their grief. I met so many women who had lost children in the last six to eighteen months. No wonder their response was muted, they were still in this, deep in the middle of the feelings, the pain, the confusion I go over in my show. In fact, by the end of the play, Toni and I were further along than a number of those in attendance.

I am glad I get the chance, after each performance, to meet so many of the people who come to see it, I would find it very dizzying and uncomfortable to just go backstage, change and leave. I think this is why New York was so difficult. I'd do the show, change, and hit the sidwalk, and everyone would be gone, onto the next thing. Even in Minnesota there were usually a few hanging back to say something.

This has been a very good experience, the folks here have been too kind. Even the hotel's really good (big ups, Courtyard Marriott.) There's even talk of returning, and I think we'd all like that.

I think I'm dumb

Sometimes my performance is part of a larger conference. Here in Louisville, it's actually a separate event which was orchestrated by Amy M. to coincide with a conference. Today there is a day-long event, Postpartum Depression and Infant Development, at Baptist Hospital. The keynote speaker was Dr. T. Berry Brazelton, and it was our desire to get to see him speak.

In brief, we succeeded, in spite of a dear lack of sleep and several wrong turns on our drive to the hospital. Wow, what an incredible man. In short, his was a plea that we basically need to change our medical establishment, our education establishment, our government and our society for the sake of children and their parents - and of course, he's right - but his talk made you believe, as if for the first time, that this is necessary, important, and possible.

Attending such events, as part of my travels presenting IHT, makes me feel how little I have actually picked up, or how few advantages I have taken, presented with the possibility of hearing such lectures, or meeting such people. Sorry, I don't mean to make it all about me, but you know, it is all about me.

I don't just mean to imply I am merely thick or feckless, it is all irritating how many times I have attempted to accomplish something, take advantage of an opportunity, and I end up getting smacked with a migraine or just miss the bus. Today I was terribly grateful, after last night's ordeal, to actually make it to the church on time.

Or the hospital. Tonight I need to make in to the church on time. And I need to decide if I do the show in street clothes with glasses, The Sweater without contacts, or The Sweater with glasses. I really do not want to do the show in The Sweater and glasses, I don't think that looks right. I have done the show in a T-shirt before, but that was because it was sweltering and not because I am a bonehead.

Schmuck, me.

Welcome to Louisville. And thank you, Continental Airlines, for making me and my family sit around Concourse D for five hours, waiting for a delayed flight from LaGuardia. What a lovely evening.

The big shock upon our descent into Kentucky was the discovery that although I have plenty of contact lenses, they are all for my right eye. It will be a very blurry show for me tomorrow.

I mean, today. This is a Heineken. Cheers!